I don’t know why you would want the worlds longest sidebar, its just a waste of space, waste of loading time and pretty much pointless. There is a site aiming to get the worlds longest sidebar. Whatever floats your boat, I say.

Here’s a list of things to add to your sidebar to make it the worlds longest, however it may take you a while to beat this sidebar

1. The first thing you need to do is starve your sidebar of width and make it at the most 2 inches wide. It is best of course for your sidebar to be really skinny at around 2.5 cms (1 inch), because everyone knows the skinnier it is the more information gets squashed down making it longer. Tall and skinny is the way to go, none of this fat and short stuff.
2. Make a button wall or plug board in your sidebar. Fill it with as many links as possible. Don’t use text links. Make sure they are cute little button images that stack on each other causing the sidebar to grow taller.
3. Now add the special links with slightly bigger buttons that you charge your visitors to put there. Make sure you have two or three and then put a text link asking anyone else to buy an ad.
4. Add a description of yourself and your website. About me and Domain pages are so 2002, why not just squeeze all the information into the sidebar so no one has to click on pages they don’t need to when they can see it all before them.
5. Add a currently/updates sidebar plugin or twitter extension. But don’t limit yourself to the normal three small excerpt updates. No, you need to bloat your sidebar right up, so use at least ten updates showing at one time, and make sure they are the full update. Small blurbs are so last month.
6. Now chuck in a camwhore image for good measure. Not only making the cam image clickable, also provide 3 text links beneath it telling us to click on the cam image.
7. Throw in an advertisement or two. Nice big banners.
8. Link to every contest known to man to increase your chances of winning, and increase the length of your sidebar
9. Hey why not advertise for more. Google Adsense is your best friend. Put in 3 or 4 small box ads, or better yet use a long ‘skyscraper’ ad.
10. Hey we love ads don’t we? Lets add some more advertisements, this time to advertise all the PayPerPost and “make money online” because there’s nothing better than showing someone how desperate we are for some cold hard cash.
11. More ads. If you are going for text links make sure you have at least ten, if image links make sure you have at least five.
12. With all these ads on your sidebar you’re going to want some advertising back. So throw in a few “link me” buttons and a text area code box to boot.
13. Add 30 or so text links to various myspace layout sites and the like, you know, the ones with the high page rank and if you link them they link you. This is the ‘commercial’ affiliates list. Of course the the personal sites affiliate list is next.
14. See what did I say. Put 10 or more affiliate links here.
15. Think we were finished yet? Apparently not so. Heres where you put a bunch of traffic boost links, because we are so desperate for link backs with all the outgoing links clogging up your sidebar.
16. Nice. Put in a big “support this site, donate money to my paypal” link.
17. Join every topsite under the sun and then link their buttons in the sidebar. You need to join at least 15 topsites.
18. Oh God, we still aren’t finished. Do you not want the longest sidebar in the world? Of course you do, so fill this space with a clutter of rotation links. I stopped counting after 51, so we know you are on the right track if you have at least 50 rotation buttons here. At least.
19. Here is where you list the listings you have joined. Glitter, rejuvenated, ablaze, every listing that will accept you.
20. Put your stats here. Show how many are online, how many have visited in total, how many have visited today, and why not put a few links to your extreme checker and other statistics sites.
21. Put in your archives right near the bottom, because it is a common task for the visitor to scroll right down to the bottom to read your archives. Hey at least they will see all those button links and affiliates, that’s what you want right?
22. Random links go here. Anything random that didn’t fit in the other lists above, or just a bunch of buttons to make your sidebar extremely long. Look we’re nearly there.
23. Yay, add your credits here and you are all done.
24. But of course you can add some more junk like clocks, calendars, flash widgets, lastfm, music players and more. Just trawl the myspace layout sites and they will have plenty of crap to chuck in here. You could always add some more Google ads too.

Now of course this was completely satirical and is not meant to be taken seriously.